he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
try to milk me bitch
Randomize
