is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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