plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
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