If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
Randomize
