don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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