butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
I just forgot I was standing up.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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