I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Randomize
