My room smells like vodka and shame
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Randomize
