I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
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