i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize