i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
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