My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Randomize
