I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
