i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
