She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
