I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
Randomize