moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
