U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize
