Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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