The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
