Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
