Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
