we have pet lesbian snakes
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
