You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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