u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
PANTIES FOUND
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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