I'm jealous of your bromance
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize
