you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
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