Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
I party with great urgency now.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
Randomize
