she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
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