I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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