I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
it's great music for shaving your balls
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Everyone says I win the strip club
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
that may or may not have been my penis.
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