So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
