Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Boobs are out for the taking
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize