Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
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