I seem to have left my pride at pride
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Randomize