belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize