yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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