I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
Who did Billy Mays play for?
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
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