Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize