return my video game
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
I just had sex on a roof
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
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