kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
