doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
