Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Randomize