The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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