ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
