got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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