FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
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