Sponge bath it is.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
