please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
It was like getting head from an anaconda
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
