Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
