Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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