I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I have aggressive nipples.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize